C'mon let's do the Elephant dance!

Are you ready?

Grab your partner and let's go!

How do you raise a baby elephant?
With a fork lift truck!
Why shouldn't you take an elephant to the zoo?
Because he'd rather go to the movies!
What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
What' s grey, has four legs and jumps up and down?
An elephant on a trampoline!
Let's dance the night away!
  How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed?

When your nose touches the ceiling!

What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!

Why does an elephant wear sneakers?

So that he can sneak up on mice!

What's grey and moves at a hundred miles an hour?

A jet propelled elephant!

What is an elephants
favorite movie?

What do elephants say as a compliment?

You look elephantastic!
What did the elephant say to the famous detective?

It's ele-mentary, my dear Sherlock!
What do you do if you find a blue elephant?

Try and cheer him up!
What is a baby elephant after
he is five weeks old?

Six weeks old!
How to you keep an elephant in suspense?

I'll tell you tomorrow!
What's big and grey and wears a mask? 

The elephantom of the opera! 

What's grey and never needs ironing? 

A drip dry elephant! 

What's big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland?

The Loch Ness Elephant!

What's big and grey and protects you from the rain?

An umbrellaphant!

Why do elephants have trunks? 

Because they would look silly carrying suitcases! 

Because they've no pockets to put things in! 

What pill would you give to an elephant that can't sleep? 


How do elephants talk to each other?
By 'elephone! O' course!
When do elephants have 8 feet?
When there are two of them!
What do you give an elephant with big feet?
Plenty of room!
A one and a two and a three, kick, step, kick

What do you find in an elephants graveyard?
What do you do with old cannon balls?
Give them to elephants to use as marbles!
What do elephants do in the evenings?
Watch elevision!
I'm a dancin' fool! Don't you just love it!
What do elephants sing at Christmas?

Noel-ephants, Noel-ephants...

Who do elephants get their Christmas presents from?

Elephanta Claus!

How are elephants and hippopotamuses alike?

Neither can play basketball!

Bill: "My homework is really difficult tonight, I've to write an essay on an elephant."

Bert: "Well, for a start you're going to need a big ladder.."

How does an elephant get out of a small car?

The same way that he got in!


Hee, Hee, Hee!

Ha, Ha, Ha!

Why did the elephant cross the road?

Because the chicken was having a day off!

Oooh! That was baaad!


All right men, follow me!

Hup, two, four, six, eight!

What do we appreciate!?

Ele-phuny elephant jokes!
How to you tell the difference between an elephant and a mouse?

Try picking them up!

What steps would you take if you were being chased by an elephant?

Big ones!

What happened to the elephant who ran away with the circus?

The police made him bring it back!

What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court?


Why is an elephant braver than a hen?

Because the elephant isn't chicken!
When should you feed milk to a baby elephant?

When it's a baby elephant!
Why do elephants do well in school?

Because they have a lot of grey matter!

Why don't elephants like playing cards in the jungle?

Because of all the cheetahs!
Watch out for that tree!!!
What's grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds?

An elephant with hiccups!

What's grey, carries a bunch of flowers and cheers you up when you're ill?

A get wellephant!

What's yellow on the outside and grey on the inside?

An elephant disguised as a banana!

What's the best way to see a charging herd of elephants?

On television!

What's the difference between an elephant and a banana?

Have you ever tried to peel an elephant?


What's grey and lights up?

An electric elephant!

What's grey but turns red?

An embarrassed elephant!

How do you hire an elephant?

Stand it on four bricks!

What' s big and grey with horns?

An elephant marching band!

Teacher: "To which family does the elephant belong?"

Pupil: "I don't know, nobody I know owns one!"

Teacher: "Where would you find an elephant?"

Pupil: "You don't have to find them, they're too big to lose!"

Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?

So he could hide in the cherry tree!

Why did the elephant paint himself with different colours?

Because he wanted to hide in the colouring box!


What's as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

An elephant's shadow!

How do you get an elephant into a matchbox?

Take all the matches out first!
What is worse than raining cats and dogs?

Raining elephants!

Why do elephants have flat feet?

From jumping out of tall trees!



What's big and grey and has 16 wheels?

An elephant on roller skates!
What did the elephant say when the man grabbed him by the tail? 

This is the end of me!

Elephants are cool!

What's the difference between an elephant and a piece of paper?

You can't make a paper airplane out of an elephant!